Road Trip
I've discovered that I really like long-haul drives. I don't know why. Maybe because I can use it as an excuse to eat CheetOs while watching bugs suicide on my windshield at 105mph. Which, as far as I can tell, is just about the pinnacle of the human experience. Here are some other highlights of the trip I made this weekend.
- Watched: The frighteningly transparent entrails of some unidentifiable bug slowly shiver up my windshield in a 95mph gale until it disappeared onto the top of my car. Should have been watching the road, but it was almost exactly like watching those sticky wall-walker toys that you used to get from the 25-cent toy vending machines, only in reverse.
- Saw THE COOLEST THING EVER, which was: A professor at a university I visited has the name "Mack A. Player," conveniently printed in copperplate on his door tag. Likely a Ph.D. in Pimpology.
- Saw: Jish and Purnima's new portable bear. Cute! Also saw it take a dump. Cuteness factor halved. Then it whined and chewed on my fingers a little. Cuteness factor restored!
- Heard: a truck driver have the most heinous BM ever, in a truck stop stall next to mine. Imagine a dozen water balloons, making out really enthusiastically with a jar of month-old mayonnaise. Then the balloons pop, and they're full of dead slugs, which you then eat. That face you made, right there! That was my reaction.
- Smelled: Take a guess.
- Ate: 1 bag Cheet-Os, 1 bag Fritos, 1 ziploc of "Hint of Lime" tortillas (Thanks P), french fries from Jack in the Box, and pizza. Now I am back on rabbit food.
- Drank: 1 canned coffee, 2 arizona iced tea, 3 bottled waters, and a beer. At least one of those was not consumed in the car.
- Listened to: Books on tape! I love Audible.